Life, Musings, Misadventures, Epiphanies by Arun Raj

Times of Unhope and distress spread wide, When breaketh loose, hell’s Mistress on Earth’s crust. While many action-less, uncouth in passion to lace our souls, She reigns and maims bodies and souls. The mistress of hell declares to have achieved a feat, With her command over lay souls, she defeats Sometimes true souls in light of Love and Faith, With her warriors Distrust, Deceit, Pride and Greed. What began as a bout of a common ego, Takes a trip that severs ties across obscure boundaries. Some go To the fields of fray on the whims of others, Convinced of a better tomorrow with the end of another’s. Layman ignorance of many a low soul Have been cause for one too many a gaping hole. A generation maimed but breathing, in the terror of a moment Lost in time but scarred in permanence; for another – indifferent! The plight of War is now one chance to prove, What for one is Truth and what another may disapprove. But in this toil between the Mistress and Truth Be aware though, doeth innocent

Her curls stranded in fidgety fingers “Your words by no means pardon deserve.” He takes her arm – reluctance showing, “My words match not my heart’s pleasure.” Her qualm reserve striking a frown, “Your failing resolve is my heart’s displeasure.” He to goes down on his knees - in a light laugh, “Bequeath your heart - unto me, & I pledge otherwise.” A ray of light settled her eyes to a long blink, “So you promise – to never let me down?” Raising himself, his eyes – sparkling in hope, “To my best breath – till it lasts with strength!” She stood along in a silence, “There is a meaning to the words I say.” And He - in his pleading best. “Hidden in that evasive smile of yours.” In a claiming stance, she holds his arms, “And in every word I wish the audience in you.” - Arun Raj Note: The woman always has the last word.

Eve teasing, as I see it, spans from simple eye-balling (staring), to more verbal confrontations and physical assaults. I see eve teasing, in the Indian context, as stemming from the sheer ignorance of the aam-Indian household's stigma about sex. The hypocritical nature of post-colonial Indian ideologies juxtaposed with globalization presenting alternative worlds to our 'conservative' junta, distorts the craving / need for understanding the most basic of our instincts – the need to breed, pure hormonal drives. The suppressing of such hormonal drives and not being able understand feelings I deem as a latent motivator to the expression of these drives through media like brothels, dance bars & eve-teasing. This instinctive drive making men vulnerable to such deep cravings and drives them to explore these feelings. This craving is natural and equally certain to be possessed by men from the most refined families of the societies to the men of lowest end of income levels. It&

Notice - far away, a distant shrill Cry of a child - a mother await. A taken signal, a beggar child Awaits a giver - generous and fly. Wishful thinking - a child in catching stance: 'I shall be the hero, with this one in hand.' 'Dare you!' A kindergarten tot to another tries; To climb a tree or be called - loser shy. A returning father, his wage in hand Hopes a day - better shades than gray and white. A labor hand - tired on a strenuous day; Dreams - 'When I would not have to work!' A working mother, rushes home Thinking wild: ‘All my chores, and a family's wails.’ Standing by - her children, counted three! Each hand and arm full of trying screams & moans. Two lovers pass - unfazed by life, Their chemistry loud, resounding of objective lies. A few friends’ standby - catching a smoke, Telling tales - an expedition in the recent past. Standing in ovation, to a politic try; A keen crowd in loud hope - A better tomorrow! A fight breaking - a shallow cause, A

I could not have been clearer in thought than this morning. The reality sparkled as though the first ray of a dawning sun - evident of a new day's beginning. Beyond all the random clutter that spread across the vacuum of my incomplete life's distorted reality perceptions, it now sparkled clear. Every breath I took in I reminisced about what I had become – a resounding lull sustained with endless logic and reasoning. And in the lull, I stood helpless - What could I do now? In my inability to take a heart's stand on a truth that now appeared as clear as the purest form of faith - I lost her! I had failed myself! Time was one enemy - a tough adversary, always at its fighting best. I lost the silent war that we all wage with Time that builds false bridges between life’s desires and truth. In time I lost clarity of desire and truth, in time I lost strength, in time We lost faith. And thus, unlike every morning I knew today, I was waking up to a disturbing emptiness - without he

If your smile were the light That shined the testing paths Along the treacherous walks of life, I would gladly walk along. As if it were just a path Of flowers and lazy petals - un-paced. I wish you were mine then, For the known and unknown eternity now to only see your smile sparkle my everyday with love.

A broken heart wishes hard, To mend itself from a few broken shard. Tears of blue blood, In fear of the next stray sword. Slayed by pain of wrought memories, I own a mind fray in vain worries. The last fall sparks a distant cue - All the play & games, ends in an unfair rue. I hold on to a tiny thread of hope, Lying await for your words of love speak to drop. I push harder in a stray hope To make you feel my silent hope. My last wish now, I wish a little harder; To stop my broken heart's leak! ~Arun Raj

Conversation after conversation that I have engaged with women I have been privileged to have the company of in my life, I have observed one thing : the innate power of a woman to endure pain – physical and mental, is by far unmatchable by men. And this I feel makes them more divine than human. If most of them have learnt to live with it then it is not out of feeling physically insecure of surviving without men, but an ability to see things beyond a man's sensibility can perceive – unconditional love. Observe this in their fights and protests, they will always prefer to not cause pain and any induced suffering. In complete contrast would be a man's position, which is then to take to arms and battle it out. Very few men have been able to understand the value of the women to the society and stand for there cause – Gandhi, Vivekanada, Periyar, and many others. Even though to date their efforts have brought great relief to the oppression on our women, but still the silent battles r

While wondering about the relationship of time to life and the consequences of the variants of the existential dilemma we all go through in life, I could not help but conclude this. Life is a consequence of time and time a consequence of an existential doubt. I saw the existential doubt as an apt metaphor for the daily doubts and conflicts we keep having, which is summed up pretty simply by Shakespeare as ‘To be or not to be’. Most of our doubts, daemons and conflicts can be categorized as 'Should I be myself or conform by expectations form me?' or 'What if I do this and what if I don't?'. And in the process of this of conflict spend a great amount of quality time. TIME then becomes the consequence of the EXISTENTIAL DOUBT. On Existential doubt, one of the founders of this philosophy comments: What I really lack is to be clear in my mind what I am to do, not what I am to know, except in so far as a certain knowledge must precede every action. The thing is to under

We at Prayas to date have successfully admitted and processed more than 35 children to a better state of academic schooling than what they had previously. Recently, during one of those admitting sessions, we had compulsorily asked the parents to join their children to the school for the process. Five children along with their mother and father came along even though it was already time for the parents to go off to work. The admission process began with a few questions about their family and other details. One excited child stood there, as she was asked questions by the principal, clutching onto and playing with her skirt. She stood there part smiling and part confused while she abruptly glanced at him. Then, I noticed him! There stood a father, next to his child. From his expressions I noticed that he could have been deeply contemplating and calculating the outflow of his monthly wages towards his child's education, the bills, the food, etc. In the moment that froze in front

As I was pulled towards the ground, a strong and unfamiliar type of fear had taken me over. The support under my feet had just vanished for a few seconds and it felt like that moment in itself was a teacher of Buddha proportions. I had jumped off with the expectation of a different consequential fear that the height had spurred in me as I had a fear of heights, but now I felt another fear. The fear as I felt now was more akin to a state of insecurity and then of being connected to a force beyond my mortal control. The cliff though was only 20 feet high still gave a good 3 seconds of free fall before you landed. As the rafting experience and its multiple rushes, gushes & twirls had not enthused me, I was growing disappointed as it was almost the end of the 12 mile stretch. While I was not in a mood to try this part of the experience (Cliff jumping), that I had paid for, a voice inside me roared onto me and drove me to give it a try. I climbed the cliff which was now crowded by a bun

In a waiting stance, he waits and waits – For her and her’s only love struck stare. To be he wishes, but wishes deny, In her arms to lay and sleep - in peace! To be he wishes, but a forlorn strait Stands between them; reluctant it blows! “Oh! Let me flow through thy trying flows, To reach ashore, where my love awaits!” To the Strait he prays louder and louder, In her arms to lay and sleep - in peace! Her eyes strain beyond the forlorn strait, In failing Hope, but she would wait. A distant beacon dims and shines As her heart wails and wails. A storm broke, a year from now; Across the forlorn strait it spread. “Take Me around this storm, for I can no longer take This unending wait, oh forlorn Strait!” To the strait she hollers, louder and louder, As her heart, wails and wails. The strait spoke, with lightning strikes fray, “My passing by has caused your heart pain; My frivolous waves have crushed your boats;

Each time I attend a marriage ceremony an hear the vows of commitment, surrender and eternal love, I am only confused further. I cannot help but laugh at my own naivety, at a point in my life, a while back where I thought I was ready for marriage :P I then look at the faces of the bride and groom and I wish to get into that sacred knot myself. But the fear of giving myself completely unto someone then strikes me inadvertently as a sense of losing myself. They say that guys generally tend to have this sense of relinquishing control before marriage and there are a good number of movies too that present this state of mind of men like 'Pyaar Ke Side Effects' for example :) I can then only honestly, go hats off to these people who commit for a lifetime and wish them happiness throughout their married lives and wish that I too get somebody I could relinquish control to - unreasoned. Love, Marriage & Happiness :) Wow ! Wishing a happy married life to a dear friends - Kannan &

Why did I feel that? I have always felt that people are inherently good. I truly and deeply believe, there is somewhere deep inside them a lost innocence and beauty, as if a new born baby - peaceful, naive and calm. A state where doubts, fears, worries & discontent dissolves into inexistence. Actions here are not influenced or intimidated into being, they are but following a natural course of life's happenings. Abstract and confusing is it? Yes, because you may feel you have not felt this exact state or will never be able to feel it. But you may not be correct in presuming that fact. Notice and observe the precise moments before you drift into deep sleep after a day of hard work. When all sounds around you, however disturbing they may be, would not be able to upset your tired drowsy eyes shutting down. Notice that peaceful moment when you wake up early in the morning as the sun rises and a gleaming ray breaks through and pierces your eyelids as if a blessing in disguise. You fe

I wish for you today - The sun shines  Brighter for you, unlike any other day - before today.  With harps of hope strumming to odes  Of certain times of love & happiness ahead. I wish for you today - A friend long lost, Shall come back; to your surprise and heartfelt elation.  And bring back those memories of summer days, When you shared a cool lemonade or two. I wish for you today - Strangers that smile Unreasoned & unfettered. Let the birds & passer-by's  Sing for you unbound; expressing their joyful excitement  With placid thoughts in faith of our silent lord - almighty. I wish for you today - A cup of tea; You could sip by a placid street; that flatters your senses To an instant churn of dancing temptations.  I wish you a sip –a stolen moment, with you and yourself. I wish for you today – A satisfying day; as it ends Full of wishes fulfilled. A day as it ends in the light  Of a starlit sky Where dreams are only reality doused  In vivid colors, onto the canvas of lif

In an attempt to  blend poetry through typo and art digitally and through canvas into a blend that let you truly enjoy the expression. This is my first attempt. Am considering working on more of these :) May be someday I will have a bunch of these selling out :P

There are times in life when we just need to let go. There are things that happen to us which are completely beyond our control. No matter what we do to counter it, it just tends to happen eventually. Then all our efforts towards stopping it seem futile and we lose hope. Here comes that over/under-rated superior being we all, with all due respect, call GOD. Being lost in contemplation, deep in the worry of things beyond our control we fret and panic at simple things. Daily activities seem like a chore and hope seems dead and beyond reach. Being here is the most difficult part as whatever another person tells you, you are just not able to hear it. You are lost in the noise that your incapacitating worry has caused you. 'Where am I?' a voice inside you cries out in search for an answer. You are but only ripe to hear a simple, lost voice called the inner voice or the voice from inside you. Some also comfortably call it - The voice of God, even others that call it the 'hear

The Origin of the Chocolate Theory: Ok chocolates are known to be sinful indulgence and an aphrodisiac. I have been a loyal & indulgent fan of chocolates and enjoy every moment spent from opening the wrapper to relishing the last bit of it with complete surrender. And so while in a silent moment of centered & focussed indulgence, it struck me one day - the 'Chocolate theory', as if an apple on Newton's head. How uncanny but similar is the nature of Chocolate to the nature of the human Feminine? The Theory states that: " Chocolate & the human Feminine have a resemblance in its existential definition. Chocolate's nature may, based on prominent characteristics be extrapolated to the nature of the human feminine. The feminine nature prominently reflects certain scientifically proven pleasures & consequences of the consumption of Chocolate which we will see in the flow of this theoretical blogumentary about the Chocolate theory. " Here is an interes